I am depressed – And that’s OKAY.
It seems like such a counterintuitive statement. An oxymoron of sorts. Depression affects a lot of folks in life and in varying degrees of severity. But one thing makes depression the same for all. The need to feel accepted and that they are heard.
Sometimes however that need gets too loud and overbearing… towards others.
You see, I have recently been put on medication to help me cope. People often see people who are depressed as ones who feel life is tough and exceedingly unfair. What exactly feels so unfair to people who are depressed? Well that’s a misconception really. It’s not that I actually feel like life is unfair. It just feels overly complicated and overwhelming. I know that it’s life. But what I don’t know is why it should be so tough? Others make it look easy.
Either way, neither here nor there. I am depressed – and that’s OKAY.
Depression makes me do all sorts of things that I most likely shouldn’t. It can make me appear hot headed when all I want is for someone to hear me out. You could say I’m looking for validation, which I guess, is true for everyone in life. But when you’re depressed one seems to want it almost desperately.
But you know what? I’m depressed and it’s OKAY.
Why do I keep saying that? Well because it’s true. There is such a stigma that if you are depressed that you are sub human or somehow inferior or that your emotions don’t matter. No, don’t get defensive. It’s true, the stigma exists… In each and everyone of us who are depressed. This is how we feel on a daily basis.
I guess personally I know that I am being silly. I know I am being self defeating and beating myself up for no reason, yet, I can not help it. As stupid as that sounds, I really can’t.
Yet, I am depressed – And that’s OKAY.
Alright I still haven’t stated why it’s OKAY. Well, because it is OKAY.
Because it will be OKAY.
Because I am seeking help.
Because no matter how lonely I feel I have loved ones who care, even if my mind tells me otherwise.
Because no matter how angry someone makes me when they don’t validate my opinion, I know, deep down, that they just have their own opinion and it’s normal for them to have it. I am not the begin all and end all of opinions.
Because no matter how much sadness I feel in my heart, my spirit is not yet broken.
Because it’s not silly to admit that I am depressed.
I guess I needed to write this for myself. Not for anyone else. I needed to put down somewhere that even though I am depressed, it’s okay.
Life is hard. Life is tough. It is for everyone. I need to realise that I am not alone in that. No, I will not live a life where I constantly tell myself there are others worse off than myself. Yes there are people who suffer much worse (And are more than likely still happier than myself), but you know what. My life, my worries, my fears, hopes and dreams matter. To me. To my family. To my loved ones.
I am not alone. There are many people out there who are depressed. You know what. You are depressed and it’s OKAY.
Why? Because it will not last forever. It can’t last forever. Things will get better. Just remember that. Just remember that your life, hopes and dreams, fears and disappointment have meaning. It has meaning to you and THAT, that right there makes you alive. Why?
You are still human inside. Because you can still feel.